about the single baby mama

Jenine Sanford Holmes, is a writer and single mom to, Julia, a beautiful girl I adopted at eight months of age. This blog features the highs, lows and joys of parenthood that come with our lives  in New York City.  You may not find a new post every week ( or every month for that matter.) However, I make it my goal to post thoughtful, rich writing on my blog, because I write in truth. And want you to read the same.

My main writing website can be found at:  http://www.jenineholmes.org

25 thoughts on “about the single baby mama”

  1. Your Essay, “Single By Chance” was beautiful, very well written, and it is obvious that the thoughts you shared came from very deep in your soul. I will be honest and tell you that I am a mother of two children, both conceived by my (ex) husband and myself, through love and luck. Something in your story struck a chord with me, in my heart. I will follow your story and will pray for you and your child. Since my children are grown and I am now expecting my first grandchild in 10 days, I spend a lot of my time knitting. I would truly love to make something special for your child, the coming new center of your life. I don’t know how we can communicate privately, but would love to contact you OR have you contact me. Where there’s a will … I hope to hear from you.

    1. Congrats on your first grand baby. That’s beautiful.
      One thing I’ve learned how ever you get your kids, just be thankful.
      And you sound thankful.
      That’s so great that you want to knit something for my child! At the moment of one friend’s is knitting away after finally being given the go ahead….and I’m eye baling a pattern myself!
      But if I feel I’m running short in the winter, I’ll shoot you and e-mail! : ) !!!

      Have great week,

  2. I’m also a single, adoptive mother. My path was slightly different but you and I share the same goal: motherhood.

    I have completed a book proposal on the subject and would to talk to you!

  3. Jenine,
    My time is free and I would love to make something for your new blessing. Although I am expexting my first grandchild next week, neither the newborn child, nor my children are in my life. Nine years ago my children decided I was not good enough for them. Of course, this decision was made after I put them both through college. Perhaps in a different sense, I can understand the longing and emptiness you feel in your heart. Through years of struggle, lonliness and unimaginable pain, I have finally found joy in celebrating special new mothers and I spend my time creating things for these special mothers, mothers like you. I have taken my personal pain and turned it into joy for others. I also knit a variety of things for the NICU at a hospital close to me and I make certain that the local women’s shelter is well supplied with handmade items for those mothers and children that are hurting and alone. My offer remains open. In the meantime, you and your (soon to be) daughter will remain in my prayers. I am so happy for you. Best Wishes

    1. Dear Liz, Will all the things new friends and old have given me for my daughter just in the last week, I now know, the joy of… the more the merrier!

      So send that sweater on or whatever else you like to make.
      I’d be honored.

      Please send it to: Jenine Holmes
      P.O. Box 547
      New York, NY 10014

      Right now she’s close to five months, but a little on the small side…

      Thanks again for thinking of us, especially since you care for so many people!

      Be well,


  4. I love your writing style. Now I know. The Stella visits entry was so poignant. Thank you for this. I know it is an act of staying sane throughout the waiting ordeal and it is quite wonderful on a literary level to read it as well.

  5. Hi Jenine!
    Twanna led me to your blog — I’m so thrilled for you! I can’t wait to hear more about your daughter when you get home.
    Please come visit us at our site…. there are LOTS of choice mom readers.

    P.S. I just finished reading the adoption memoir, “Mamalita” (Seal Press), which I highly recommend.

  6. Thanks for your blog, Jenine. I wish that you had started your blog even earlier–I’m just beginning this journey and am completely befuddled with it all. Hoping that you’re on a plane to Ethiopia soon.

    1. Dear Heather,

      I’m so happy to hear that my blog is a help to you! I couldn’t write about the process before, too difficult, to emotional, too, well,…too. I’ll write a post covering more details soon. In the meanwhile, fell free to send any questions my way. Happy New Year! Jenine

  7. Hi Jenine,
    I just stumbled upon your blog and I just wanted to say that I hope you hear good news soon. I am currently waiting for an embassy appt. as well (although not nearly as long as you have been). I believe we might even be with the same agency (CHSFS)? I have a 4-year old who came home in 2007.
    I can really relate to a lot of what you have written. Your thoughts on being a single mother really hit home for me. Thanks for sharing your story!


    1. Dear Paula,

      Yes, I am with CHSFS…nice group of people, the kind you want with you on this long winding road. Thanks so much for writing! It means a lot since I’m crafting words, off alone. It’s so great knowing someone is out there reading! So tell me about your lovely four year old…. : )

      Looking forward to hearing from you!

      Be well,

  8. Thanks Jenine,

    You can see my lovely and lively 4-year old on my blog. I’m almost embarrassed to send you there. I’m not a great writer and I keep it really as a life book for her. I was hoping that you would write back and say that your baby was home. Here’s hoping for embassy appointments!


  9. Hello,

    I just came across your post from last year titled “No Black Sperm — My Long, Winding Journey to Becoming a Mom.” I’m a Black man looking to donate. Other than sperm banks, are there any other groups/websites that connect donors with recipients?

    Thank You,


    1. Dear Wayne,

      I believed I sent you reply, but thought I’d do it again through the site. Please contact a donor bank in your community and work with them to add to the bank. For some reason there are more banks in California, but there are more and more across America.

      Thanks for your interest!

  10. I almost never leave a response, but I looked through a few remarks on about the single baby mama the single baby mama-my adventures in single parent adoption. I actually do have 2 questions for you if you tend not to mind. Is it simply me or does it look as if like a few of the comments come across like they are left by brain dead individuals? 😛 And, if you are posting at other online sites, I would like to follow anything new you have to post. Could you list of the complete urls of all your social community pages like your linkedin profile, Facebook page or twitter feed?

  11. I seldom comment, but i did a few searching and wound up here about the single baby mama the single baby mama-my adventures in single parent adoption. And I do have a couple of questions for you if it’s allright. Could it be simply me or does it give the impression like a few of the comments come across as if they are left by brain dead visitors? 😛 And, if you are posting at additional social sites, I’d like to keep up with everything new you have to post. Would you list of every one of your public sites like your Facebook page, twitter feed, or linkedin profile?

  12. Hey mama! I hope to see you in May, unless you’ve already graduated. I can’t believe I let 2 semesters slip by me! My daughter’s wedding took every ounce of concentration and energy I had, but now I’m back!
    I don’t know how you feel about blogging awards. From what I’ve heard, some people like them, some don’t, but I’ve been nominated for the Very Inspiring Blogger award. The requirements are that I nominate other bloggers, so tag, you’re it! You can find the details here:


    1. Thanks so much for the nomination, and thinking of me… I’m glad to know the wedding came off with out a hitch…what a beautiful time….Yes, I graduate in May, I can’t quite believe it… : ) I hope to see you…speaking of seeing didn’t I see that you received an award for fiction…? How cool! Congrats on the blogging nomination! Keep up the good work!

      See you soon,

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